‘Impending doom’ / Because of course / ‘;l;;gmlxzssaw’

‘Impending doom.’ Sure, the impressive rise in COVID-19 vaccination availability and the onset of spring weather easing outdoor activities makes it feel like the pandemic’s over, but the director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says it could all go south if people don’t keep wearing masks and social distancing.
 … and he’s pleading with governors not to back off on the mask rules.
As the Cubs prepare to become the first pro Chicago team to welcome fans since the Blackhawks game of Wednesday, March 11, 2020*, Sun-Times columnist Rick Telander asks, “Is it safe?

Two weeks in the hole. The CEO of Loretto Hospital in Chicago’s Austin neighborhood faces suspension without pay for a couple of weeks after the hospital’s administration of COVID-19 vaccines to people who weren’t eligible.
Block Club Chicago: A doctor tied to Loretto used its supply to vaccinate his relatives. (Cartoon: Keith J. Taylor.)
With Loretto cut off, here’s where West Siders can still get shots.

‘Is it time we install those anti-backup spikes on expressway ramps?’ After two wrong-way crashes left five people dead on the Eisenhower in one day, columnist Eric Zorn wants to know.
How those vehicles got there remained under investigation.

‘I am sorry to you for the last several years.’ A federal judge told a Chicago man who was wrongfully pulled over, handcuffed and tossed in jail dozens of times—because he has the same name and birthday as another man from Downstate Illinois—she hopes Chicago Police will finally set things right.
One of the first witnesses in the trial of an ex-Minneapolis police officer accused of murdering George Floyd May 25 told the jury he saw Floyd “slowly fade away … like a fish in a bag.”

Not so white, not so male. President Biden’s first crop of judicial nominees could give the federal bench its first Muslim American, the U.S. District Court for D.C. its first AAPI female judge, and the District of Maryland its first female judge of color …
 … one of whom becomes a front-runner for a Supreme Court seat.
The Washington Post gives Biden four Pinocchios for a false claim about Georgia’s repressive new voting law.

Speaking of Pinocchios … Donald Trump has launched a new website that The Guardian says offers “a very selective retelling of … his time in office.”
Fox News has hired a Trump.
Ex-VP Mike Pence is coming out of hiding.
The Daily Beast updates the prosecution of a Jan. 6 suspect: “Zip-Tie Guy, and His Mommy, Allowed to Go Back Home Before Capitol Riot Trial.”

May also now allow humans to cover other humans. Relenting on a widely criticized decision, the Post now will allow a reporter who survived sexual assault to report on rape.
Today, in a tweet seemingly pointed at her bosses, she shared a guide to effective apologies.

‘A hero.’ A vice president of The Daily Herald is dead after trying to save children from drowning at a Florida beach.

Because of course. Chicago-based marijuana company Green Thumb Industries is under federal investigation, the Tribune reports, “for possible pay-to-play violations during its push for coveted state licenses.”
A longtime Democratic political operative for scandal-scarred Ald. Ed Burke and ex-State Sen. Martin Sandoval is accused of deceiving the FBI.

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David vs. Amazon. An Evanston bookstore is suing Amazon in New York, accusing the company of colluding with publishers to undercut local stores’ prices.
Votes in a historic Amazon unionization drive were to be counted beginning today, but the outcome may not be clear for weeks.

‘;l;;gmlxzssaw.’ The social media account of the agency charged with overseeing U.S. nuclear weapons tweeted that out over the weekend—and it wasn’t a hacker.
If you’ve always wanted to spend more time with your LinkedIn profile, you’re in luck: Now you can add video.

Graham Crackers is a Chicago Public Square advertiser.

*A game for which your Square columnist had tickets that went unused.

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