‘Man’s greatest distraction’ / ‘We lost everything’ / Apple insecurity

‘Man’s greatest distraction.’ That’s how Northwestern University Athletic Director Derrick Gragg—you know, the guy in charge of the university’s scandal-scarred sports programs—describes women in his 2015 book.
 In an interview with the student newspaper that broke the story, Northwestern’s president says he’s worried “not in the slightest” about his job security.

‘A laughingstock into a Stanley Cup power.’ That’s how the Tribune describes the Blackhawks’ transformation under owner Rocky Wirtz, who died yesterday at 70.
 Wirtz’s legacy was tarnished by the team’s sexual assault scandal, questions about which prompted him to lose his temper—before apologizing (2022 link).

‘We lost everything.’ Block Club Chicago: West Siders are pleading for city and federal help recovering from this month’s devastating floods.
 The Chicago area was confronting a fresh round of severe thunderstorms today …
 … along with a continued heat advisory.
 The Guardian: Surface water temperatures around the Florida Keys approached a record with temperatures similar to those found in hot tubs.
 The Conversation: Extreme heat + an aging population = A direr future for America.

‘Zero homelessness.’ (Text and link corrected:) That’s the goal of an executive order a bill Gov. Pritzker signed today, creating an Illinois Interagency Task Force on Homelessness and a new government job: State Homelessness Chief. codifying the Illinois Interagency Task Force on Homelessness and the Community Advisory Council on Homelessness.

UFOs UAPs in the spotlight. Congress was holding a hearing today to learn more about what the government knows about unidentified anomalous phenomena—you know, the things we used to call unidentified flying objects.
 Watch here.

Metaphor leaves DeSantis unhurt.* Presidential candidate Ron DeSantis escaped injury in a car crash yesterday.
 New York’s Jonathan Chait: That nod to white supremacists was a strategy, not an accident.
 Media watchdog Tom Jones assesses Fox host Greg Gutfeld’s approving comments about the Holocaust.

‘Something was off.’ Columnist Matt Baron shares his frustrations in buying a new car from a dealer he says he won’t patronize again …
 … but he exacted a small amount of revenge.
 Crain’s: Illinois drivers insured by Allstate will be paying an average of more than $1,000 annually than they did at the beginning of 2022.

Apple insecurity. The company’s released another round of free system updates to protect i-things and Macintoshes from “actively exploited” security bugs.
 TidBITS: “We advise installing these updates soon.

‘A fantasyland to people like … Aldean.’ Reporter Bob Chiarito says Jason Aldean’s song Try That in a Small Town fetishizes the good ol’ days.
 Columnist Clarence Page: Aldean’s views “serve to stoke tribal anger.”
 Big winners’ refusal to cross Hollywood picket lines has derailed the Jeopardy! Tournament of Champions.

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 Brian Dunn, Mike Braden and Bill Smith made this edition better.

* Thanks to The Onion for subhead inspiration.

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