Read it. Here’s special counsel Robert Mueller’s partially censored and searchable Report On The Investigation Into Russian Interference In The 2016 Presidential Election …
■ … which Stephen Colbert notes is something “innocent people” don’t say …
■ … but which, so far, seems not to have come to pass—although Philadelphia Daily News columnist Will Bunch says it should.
■ The House Judiciary Committee is subpoenaing the Justice Department, demanding a full and unredacted version of the report.
■ Vox: “The Mueller report’s collusion section is much worse than you think.”
■ The Intercept columnist Mehdi Hasan: “Even the ‘lightly redacted’ 448 pages provide … a clear and detailed road map for impeaching.”
■ Watergate scandal convict John Dean: Mueller’s report is “more damning” than the Senate Watergate report.
■ CNN: The report leaves “no doubt … that Russia interfered in the 2016 presidential election in a ‘sweeping and systematic fashion.’”
■ The New York Times sees a national security nightmare.
■ The report nails Trump press secretary Sarah Sanders for lying—something about which she lied again today.
■ That alleged “pee tape” gets a few footnotes.
■ A Chicagoan and a late Lake Forest Republican investor get shoutouts, too.
About Wednesday night … The Tribune dissects what happened as about 500 teenagers gathered downtown on a warm evening during Chicago Public Schools’ spring break and close to three dozen people were arrested.
■ A wave of rental car thefts across Chicago has led to the arrests of 21 people.
Lightfoot’s chief choice. The chief of staff for Chicago Mayor-elect Lori Lightfoot has a tragic past: His father was convicted of first-degree murder.
■ Under fire for its messed-up handling of the Jussie Smollett prosecution, Cook County State’s Attorney Kim Foxx’s office is losing two deputies—including the ethics officer who announced Foxx had recused herself from the case.
Tollway purge. The full Illinois Tollway board has been replaced under Gov. Pritzker, who’s pledged to end “inefficiency and self-dealing” at an agency accused of handing out multimillion-dollar deals to insiders under ex-Gov. Rauner.
■ A CTA Red Line viaduct’s decaying concrete smashed a couple of cars yesterday.
■ A college student’s murder has prompted Uber to add new safety features to its app.
A crafty man. What’s left of atrophying Sears is suing its former CEO, accusing him of stripping the company of assets as it plummeted toward oblivion.
■ Suburban Westlake hospital employees and patients can be forgiven for not knowing whether the place is open or closed.
■ The family of a suburban woman who died of a fungus infection are pushing Illinois to disclose which hospitals have the bug: “Secrecy is no way to treat an illness.”
Facebook’s latest oops. It buried news that millions of Instagram passwords have been compromised.
■ Google has begun advertising on a major Fox News show.
■ A Google-Amazon truce: You’ll soon be able to watch YouTube on Fire TV devices and Amazon Prime on Chromecast and Android thingies.
■ Farewell to one of the first mobile chat apps: BlackBerry Messenger goes dark in June—unless you pay up.
Hamilton revisited. The Tribune shares a guide to Hamilton: The Exhibition, opening later this month.
■ The Flash is headed to Earth 26.
Last call. Your chance to join your fellow Chicago Public Square fans at the Chicago Headline Club’s Peter Lisagor Awards for Exemplary Journalism dinner in May expires at midnight. We’d love to see you. Details here.
■ And speaking of journalism: Here are video highlights of the 2020 Campaign Journalism Conference, for which Square last week took a couple of days off.