Follow the money. As you do your ballot homework for Tuesday’s Illinois primary, learn more about who’s buying which candidates:
■ WBEZ: Along with pro-Israel funds, tech money is swamping Democratic congressional primaries.
■ The Sun-Times offers “an A-Z glossary of the groups that are trying to influence your vote.”
■ A lawyer for 7th Congressional District candidate La Shawn Ford is demanding a crypto-currency-funded political action committee stop pounding out TV and print ads attacking Ford—who (surprise!) last year helped pass legislation to regulate parts of that industry.
■ Politico sees a path to victory for U.S. Rep. Raja Krishnamoorthi in the Democratic contest for U.S. Senate because he’s running against two Black women …
■ … one of whom Gov. Pritzker dissed yesterday.
■ Tribune reporter A.D. Quig* surveys the race for Cook County assessor, which pits “a two-term millionaire running on systemic reform against a dynastic party-backed challenger who says those changes have led to chaos and skyrocketing bills for taxpayers.”
■ Injustice Watch profiles a real estate investor who’s “made a fortune taking Cook County homes through tax foreclosure … dogged by allegations of fraud.”
‘These creeps are just saying the quiet parts louder and louder.’ Wonkette’s Evan Hurst mocks tech bro and Palantir CEO Alex Karp, who told CNBC that AI technology will lessen the power of “highly educated, often female voters, who vote mostly Democrat.”
■ Jimmy Kimmel breaks down Trump’s campaign stop in Kentucky this week with a supercut, “Real Moments in Presidementia.”
■ Columnist Jeff Tiedrich: “Serial sexual predator celebrates women’s history. Hilarity ensues.”
■ Columnist Neil Steinberg, who voted early this week: “One way to understand our current administration is this: They’re acting like they will never leave power. Whether they are correct or not depends on the survival of free and fair elections.” (Congrats to cartoonist and Pulitzer winner Jack Ohman, winner of this year’s Herblock Prize for Editorial Cartooning.)
■ Lyz Lenz’s Dingus of the Week: “Sentient Monster energy drink” Joe Rogan, who “apparently just learned how to read, because he’s kind of mad at Trump about the war in Iran.”
■ The Onion: “Trump, Mitch McConnell Clash In Oval Office Over Where They Are.”
Ready to vote? As Chicago Public Square reader Kay Ambre did yesterday, while spiffed up in a Square hoodie?
‘Trump’s war reaches America’s shores.’ Columnist Robert Hubbell blames terrorists responding to the conflict in Iran for two domestic attacks yesterday:
■ An assault on a Detroit-area synagogue by a man who lost four relatives in an Israeli airstrike on Lebanon last week …
■ … and a shooter who opened fire in a classroom at Virginia’s Old Dominion University—an ex-Army National Guardsman who pleaded guilty in 2016 to attempting to help the Islamic State.
■ Pulitzer-winning cartoonist and columnist David Horsey: “Elect stupid people, you get a stupid war.”
Windy sh_tty. With the Chicago area under a high wind warning through the afternoon, flights were grounded this morning at O’Hare …
■ … with both a high in the 60s and snow possible Sunday …
■ … as a large swath of the country faces a blizzard, a polar vortex, a heat dome and an atmospheric river—all at once.
■ Tuesday’s storms left nearly 500 buildings damaged in Kankakee County.
■ The AP: “Human waste backing up in basements is a gut-churning sign of U.S. infrastructure problems” compounded by “heavy rains made worse by climate change.”
‘They shot my guitar.’ Musician Jocelyn Walsh and former Cook County Board candidate Cat Sharp are off the hook on federal conspiracy charges filed against them for their role in a protest outside the Broadview immigration processing center last October.
■ That leaves four others—including congressional candidate Kat Abughazaleh and Oak Park village trustee Brian Straw—still facing charges.
■ Block Club: Supporters of a Skokie woman who says she was held by the feds at O’Hare have gone silent after revelations that a German company denied she worked there, and that she’d been previously charged for making false sexual harassment accusations.
Well, wasn’t National Support Chicago Public Square Day fun? Good thing, too, because that joy softened the blow of your Square columnist’s sad 3/8 correct on this week’s news quiz from The Conversation’s quizmaster, past Jeopardy! Tournament of Champions winner Fritz Holznagel. Your turn:
■ On the other hand: It was a more respectable 9/10 here on Justin Kaufmann’s Axios quiz about Chicago department store history.
■ Guess who’s been tapped to whip up next week’s Conversation quiz while Fritz takes a break.
‘Millions of us will be tuning in to watch people involved with movies that we have not seen give speeches thanking long lists of people we have never heard of, which is why the Oscars broadcast often does not start and finish in the same fiscal quarter.’ Another Pulitzer winner, Dave Barry, who wrote jokes for Steve Martin when Martin hosted the ceremony in 2003, previews Sunday’s ceremony.
■ Saturday morning—if all goes according to schedule—the Chicago River goes green.
■ Nine months after its founder died, Chicago’s Austin Voice newspaper’s back in print.
■ Axios: The White House is outraged over a new hire at CBS News.
Apology. Y’know how we’re always reminding you that you can support Square for as little as $1, just once? At some point in recent weeks, that option fell off the support page.
■ It’s back now, and you really can pitch in just a buck …
■ … using PayPal if you prefer.
Thanks. Mike Braden made this edition better.
* Who wrote one of your Square columnist’s favorite cover letters ever (2019 link).
